FAQs

Q. Who is Ruby?

A. Ruby is a mixed breed dog who is nearly 4 years old. The shelter said she is a Chow-Australian Shepherd mix. Yes, I do see the Chow (not to mention the odd Chow personality!), but the Aussie- I think they really stretched on that one. Ruby is only the best dog in the whole world, probably even the universe, although I'm not sure what dogs might be like in the far reaches of our universe.

Q. What do you mean exactly by "odd Chow personality"?

A. Well, Ruby is rather proper for a dog. She highly disapproves of barking, jumping, and all boisterous behavior in general. Barking is only appropriate in cases of extreme danger and high alert, and then only once or twice!

Q. What exactly is Elizabrary? Is it you?

A. In a way, yes, it is me. It is my own made up fantasy library in which everything is exactly how I want it to be. Yes, Ruby can go to work with me there every day! That is the best thing about the Elizabrary!

Q. Why does Ruby run off into the woods and not return when you call her?

A. Ruby's inner wolf emerges when she is surrounded by the woods. You can see it in her eyes. She must run through the woods chasing things that move and ripping the legs off deer. A wolf can't be expected to come when called (they don't even recognize names- they just are) or walk on a leash for cryin' out loud!

Q. I have $3.2 million just lying around. Could I purchase Ruby from you for that amount?

A. In a word, no. Ruby is worth far more than $3.2 million.

Q. How can you develop such deep feelings about Ruby and do you feel she has strong attachment feelings toward you?

A. All you have to do to understand my feelings for Ruby is meet her just once. Then you too will feel as I do! I'm certain she has a strong attachment to me as she will not go back to the play area in daycare until she sees me drive away. Her daycare providers call her "a one person dog."

Q. I would love to visit Elizabrary, is that possible?

A. Only if you are brave enough to join me in my imagination. Or, if you would like to send donations we could actually build a real Elizabrary. It would not have any books by Ann Coulter, Bill O'Reilly, Dr. Laura or any about hunting. All well-behaved pets would be welcomed.

Q.How is it that you know Ruby doesn't like her former name - Rhonda? Are you a dog psychic?

A. No, I'm not a dog psychic, more like a dog whisperer. I'm so in tune with the natural world around me that I do, in fact, "talk to the animals." Perhaps if the sender inner of this question spent a little more time communing with nature she too might be able to communicate with other species. (Note: although difficult to communicate with, Chester does not count as "other species")

Q. You made no mention of any tricks such as catching frisbees, jumping through hoops, fetching the newspaper, etc. Does Ruby show talent for these types of things?

A. Elizabrary is glad you asked this question. Ruby knows many commands (and actually responds to them most of the time). They are: come, sit, stay, lie down, drop it, step over, leave it, shake, high five, and take it to Rachel. Sadly, this last command has been misunderstood so that any time I have paper money in my hands Ruby grabs it and takes it to her sister!

Q. Who is Ruby's favorite musical artist?

A. Ruby loves Bob Marley. Her favorite song is "One Love." She frequently nods her head in time to his music, which is getting pretty wild for Ruby.

Q.  What species would you say this Chester is? Is there a class for this object? Maybe the Dog Whisperer can help this Chester?  Then with more thought I don't think so.

A. Elizabrary finds this question truly difficult to answer. Upon conducting a Google search here is what I found: "The Chester species are compared with Lower Carboniferous species of Scotland." So, we know he is Scottish (although I never noticed the accent) and that we can compare him to something we have never heard of (that could explain a whole lot!). Ruby's sister Rachel claims he is a "Papaw" with big bucks!

Q. Since Ruby will have a dominant role in Elizabrary, what are the kinds of book she would recommend.?  I am wondering about all of the good self help books, which does Ruby read.?

A. Ruby likes books with dogs in them. Recently she enjoyed The Story of Edgar Sawtelle by David Wroblewski (before Oprah's dumb ass even knew it existed!) and Odd Hours by Dean Koontz, as well as Bliss to You by Trixie Koontz (Dean's sadly deceased, beloved dog). When she is tired I read her children's books about dogs and she falls asleep.

As for self-help books, Ruby goes for anything by the Dog Whisperer (Cesar Milan) or the Monks of New Skete (check out this link if you have never heard of them- they are awsome). Sometimes I think about running away to the monestary and becoming a nun at New Skete. But I'm not so sure they would take me- this statement doesn't call for questions or comments about my past! She and I also recently read Be the Dog: Secrets of the Natural Dog Owner by Steve Duno and we both liked that one a lot!

Q. I am curious. If Elizabrary was a real library, would Ruby favor the censoring of any books?

A. Of course, she agrees with me completely about certain authors we do not want in our library. She is also against hunting books or any type of book that talks about being unkind to animals in any way. We just in general will ban books about things we don't like or those that are written by stupid people (Bill O'Reilly, Anne Coulter, oh maybe I already mentioned them). After all, it's our library! Oh, and if you're trying to be smart by thinking you can donate those types of items to get them into the collection, think again. I will train Ruby to take them immediately to the trash- I won't even recycle them, and I live in Bloomington!

Q. Didn't Ruby like Darkest Evening of the Year by Dean Koontz? 

A. Yes, she did in fact like this book, except for the tacked on ending.  She likes all of Dean Koontz's books because of his relationship with his wonderful dog Trixie.

Q. Can Dobby work at the Elizabrary?  He promises to ignore Ruby.

A. Of course Dobby can work at the Elizabrary. Ruby will help carrying books and leading people to the bathrooms. Dobby would also be excellent at cleaning up crumbs from the floor and getting excited about anything and everything that happens!

Q. Who the heck is Homer and where did he come from?

A. Well, duh- Homer is the Grim Reaper. What did you think? Did he not strike fear into your very soul when you saw him? He is sitting at my desk with me now, making sure I eat my lunch and get directly back to work in 60 minutes- no more, no less. Where did Homer come from? Well, if I knew the answer to that then I would be able to answer questions like, "What is the meaning of life?" and "Why are we all here?" But if you want to really know where he came from, the crazy cat lady made him for me. I don't go anywhere without him since I got him. Isn't he the best?

Q. Elizabrary, with a world of fashion now available for our animal friends, will Ruby be dressing up for Halloween? If so, what will she be dressed as?

A. This Halloween Ruby will be dressed as a ferocious red dog. It is the same thing she went as last year. She really likes that costume!

Q. Do both you and Ruby enjoy the Thanksgiving holiday? Do you both eat turkey and off the same plate?

A. Ruby and I do eat off the same plate (although we won't at Thanksgiving dinner as Grandma doesn't approve of this) and have been known to share a spoon, as well as lick off of the same popsicle or ice cream cone! You may now throw up! 

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